Family….Lets talk about IMMEDIATE family…..

As I’ve blogged about before, I recently had an encounter that has prompted some additional gratitude.  In reflecting into my past, I am undoubtedly the most luckiest person on the face of this earth!

I have become to realize that I have a GREAT family.  I come from a very old-fashioned and traditional unit with 6 siblings.  In today’s world that is a HUGE family, but it seemed as normal as the sun rising, growing up.  The more that I am out in this great big world, the more I am realizing that there are a lot of families that just don’t like each other, and/or do not stay in contact.  Most of the time, I hear people down right bitching and complaining about their family, and I wonder what has made them so resentful?  What has happened that one cannot even say a neutral word about their family unit, not let alone a nice word?  I grew up thinking that there were a few families that could not stand each other, but after being out there, it’s more vice-versa.  Sad….

I have 3 kids myself.  It has been no easy task rearing them, but after all has been said & done, I’m glad I did it, I wouldn’t change a thing, and I would do it again!  After all, the good has by far out weighed the bad. 

My oldest is 26 years old; a girl named Cale.  I know “Cale” is a boy’s name, but since I first heard it, I knew I wanted it, boy or girl.  Granted, since she is a girl, her father was not too keen on giving her a boy’s name, so while watching “The Price is Right” one day, Bob Barker announce that Kaylen was the closest bidder on a shiny new “Frigid-Aire” refrigerator, and thus, (with a little variation), Calynne was hatched.  To this day, her father calls her Calynne, and I will always call her CALE.

She is the only daughter I would ever want!  I cannot tell you how many times, when I am having a bad day, I think of my girl, and everything seems to be alright.  You see, she has always been able to somehow turn the tables for me, and help me to understand WHY I’m doing the things I’m doing; giving me a glimpse of the “big picture”, as if she were the parent and I, the child.  She is stubborn, giving, terrible with money, kind-hearted, sometimes unreasonable, talented, difficult, faithful,  kind, independent, stong-willed, and will undoubtedly love you till the end of time.  When this child loves, she loves whole heartedly.  She has an aura about her (in my eyes) that gives off vibes of confidence and REAL-ness.  If my daughter loves you, you are made to feel like you can do no wrong.  I know I maybe a little tainted by the fact that she is my daughter, but it’s without any question, if you know her.  She is currently in the “Social Worker” career, don’t figure huh!  I am so proud of her & love her dearly…

My second (and middle child) is a 25-year-old man, named Coleman.  That name just rings FAME, doesn’t it.  Of my 3-children, he was always the “momma’s boy”.  Since his older sister was so independent, I cherished that quality in him.  As Coleman grew into an adult, he has had to learn how to tackle this world on his own.  Coleman is one of the most intelligent persons I know, but has struggled with societies ways of learning.  Having A.D.D., he has had to work twice as hard, in order to thrive in school, and learn how to achieve his own way.  With that said, I must say that I am exceptionally proud of the career he has obtained!  My Coleman is a P.E. Teacher, and I cannot imagine him in any other position; as he literally breaths fitness and sports. 

Coleman is a survivor, and has definitely earned his position in life.  Him & I share the “Middle Child Syndrome”, and that in its own creates a bond between us, that will never be broken.  I am proud of Coleman mostly because I know that whatever he puts his mind to, he will succeed!  After all, success is triumph of defeat, and he just plain ‘ole doesn’t give up.  I am so proud of him & love him dearly…

My last child, the baby of the family is Cleary.  Cleary came into existence 21 years ago after a very very long laboring process.  I was somewhat befuddled when I met him, because his father and I were told that he would be a girl, and we had planned on naming him Bethany.   We had not thought of a boy’s name, so when we were told that he had to have immediate surgery, we were at a loss as to what to name him.  You see, we wanted to name him before the surgery, in case of any problems.  Long story short, his maternal grandmother named him, and the name stuck.

Not only is Cleary the baby of the family, which in itself can create some fairness issues with his siblings, but he was diagnosed with Agammagobulinemia at a few months of age (he has been in remission since the age of 5 years old).  This child has been to hell and back a couple of times, and teetered on the edge of returning back there, at least once more.   Maybe it’s for all that he has had to endure, and maybe it’s just in his genes, but Cleary has been my rock.

Cleary has always been my steadiness, and helps me to look at things through his young eyes.  He has a wonderful knack of looking at people for WHO they are, and not WHAT they are; non-judgemental.  Cleary & his older Sister, Cale have been blessed with the gift of music; singing.  Although Cale has not pursued singing, Cleary has.  He has music and performing, running through his veins.  I am so proud of him & love him dearly…

If I had one word to state what I gave to my kids, I think I would say that I gave them a good sense of humor. Or maybe it’s that they are survivors, as I am.  For sure though, I know they have my LOVE and RESPECT.  They are mine, and that feels good!

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Posted on April 20, 2010, in Family, General and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. It was nice to read this. And see how they all sorta grew up/ended up. Since I haven’t seen or heard from you guys in years. I’m glad they grew up well Jill. :)

    -Christina

  2. I’m literally sitting in the computer lab at school crying…tears of amazement and joy, of course! What you said here mom, I will always cherish. We are pieces of you and have you to thank for everything that we are. We definitely got your sense of humor and learned how to be survivors, the two things I am absolutely most proud of! I love you mom!

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